“Sexiness is a state of mind.”
~ Halle Berry
At some point in a long-term relationship, desire drops off and we worry that we’re no longer attracted to our mate or that we’re no longer attractive. That’s natural, because no one ever told us that it’s our responsibility to figure out what makes us feel sexy. So people often cave in to the forces of age by letting themselves off the hook regarding healthy eating or exercising regularly. We get complacent in our committed relationships, assuming that our partner will forgive our laziness because s/he loves us. Indeed, that is a paradoxical benefit of “growing older” with someone: We’re loved no matter what and we accept that looks and bodies change with time. But holding the opposite end of that paradox means that we have to challenge ourselves to do what makes us feel sexy, for the sake of our own vitality as well as for attracting our partner. If you’ve let yourself gain extra pounds, have stopped tending to your skin, hair, and muscle tone, then ask yourself, “Why?”
Sexual energy is a creative force in our lives and contributes to the well-being of all–meaning that when you’re vitally engaged and living a full life, others around you feel it and can be inspired to do the same. Take charge of your sexual feelings and set an example for younger generations! Ignite your sexuality by taking an inventory of where you’ve gotten lazy. Look at the changes you have to make and challenge your partner to join you in finding ways that make them feel sexy, too.
Daily Healthy Sex Acts:
- Commit to feeling sexy by doing one thing today that relaxes you or that moves you to tend to your body.
- Ask your partner about the things and actions that make them feel sexy and if they’re willing to engage in a process of change with you.
- After you try those activities, notice how you feel. Make a list of activities that make you feel sexy and commit to doing them on a regular basis.